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Joy comes in the morning, sometimes…

I woke up in an oddly good mood. I don’t think it’s the addition of a new coffee maker but I won’t rule out that possibility.  It may be that I was up late last night. I sat in the quiet long after the kids were asleep and listened to the wind blowing. Dave is out of town this week. I miss him when he’s gone. He’s the counter balance I need in life.  And yet, last night there was this sweet moment of quiet and aloneness. I did not make any effort to pray or think or even write. I just, well, sat and listened. I also drank a glass of wine, I’ll admit. It was a mellow night. I didn’t realize how much I needed that quiet, that aloneness, that glass of merlot.

I stayed up into single digits until I could not keep my eyes open anymore. I crawled into bed and left consciousness the moment my eyes closed, I’ll wager.

There was some thought in me to get up early today and attend Matins but 8am came and went without alarm clock interference so that was a wash. This gave me some pause and then grace and then resolve but mostly grace. Joy does that, it feeds grace, it feeds souls. I’ll take it.